I'm always restless lately. I keep flitting from one thought to another and then I end up not doing anything at all. Random thoughts and insane plans have kept me going for the past week, always coupled with procrastination. I need to step up if I want to actually accomplish what I've been planning to do with my life. On that sad note, I don't think I'm on another quarter-life crisis. How many of those can a 22-year-old handle anyway? Still, it's either I'm way over-caffeinated or I'm just really bored and acting out. January does that to me a lot. There's always something about the first month of the year where I feel compelled to do something different. I say let's just get January over with and move on because I don't think I can handle anymore of my scheming and plotting on how to be a better me,or how to be different this year. Because let's face it, I'm perfectly fine with the 2010 version of myself. I'm actually really proud of my 2010 self, I did a pretty good job last year. So why am I so hell bent on being a new me this year? I'm all for constantly improving yourself and all that shiz but right now I just can't take the pressure. I want to relax and feel contented with my life. I feel like yelling "I'm only 22 leave me alone!!!" every time I'm reminded of the grand plans I have to do this year. I'm grateful for the little things that kept me sane so far this month: drinks and senseless talks with people I love. It's the small things that matter.
One too many dinners at Ristras and beers with Jake, Cantina with the boys, countless dates at Charlie's, spur of the moment beers with the girls on a breezy night.
At the end of the day, I still end up with a nagging feeling that I have to do this for myself. I hate situations when there are "what-ifs" involved. So yes, I'm begging for my overachiever self to pop out of nowhere and deal with this crap--I'm too absorbed re-reading Fabulous Things to care right now.
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